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Senior Survival: Drama Heats Up as Only Four Contestants Remain Engaged With Class

Ben Gelderloos | May 19 2016 | in Humor

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The tension is building on Senior Survival, a blockbuster reality TV show starring Fairview seniors in a competition to see who can be t...

Printing Fees Raised to 11¢ Due to Inflation

Evan Derby | May 3 2016 | in Humor

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Following new data released by the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, the library has decided to raise the fee for printing a single blac...

Belief in Magical 'Trash Disappearance God' Rapidly Spreading

Noah Finer | Mar 16 2016 | in Humor

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A new religion called “Garbanism” has been reported rapidly spreading around students eating lunch within Fairview in which ...

How to Get More Snow Days

Noah Finer | Mar 2 2016 | in Humor

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This year, students have received a record amount of snow days in recent history for the BVSD district. Previously, it had been unheard of to rece...

Fairview, Monarch Students Peaceably Discuss Rivalry on Social Media

Ben Gelderloos | Feb 9 2016 | in Humor

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Before Tuesday’s large game, students from both Fairview High School and Monarch High School engaged in a pleasant discussion on their schoo...

Teacher Confuses Student's Essay with Doctor's Note

Noah Finer | Feb 4 2016 | in Humor

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Senior Winston Perez was confused when he was excused from class last Monday for a doctor’s note that he never knew about. Mr. Salazar, Perez’s I...

Tissue Mafia Gains Control of Fairview Tissue Market

Michal Olesiak | Feb 3 2016 | in Humor

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It used to be plato o plomo (silver or lead), but now during a peak sick season, it has become tissue or lead. Due to necessity ...

Class Questions Sanity After Seven "D" Answers in a Row on Multiple Choice Test

Evan Derby | Jan 29 2016 | in Humor

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Students taking Ms. Clemson’s Chapter 3 reading test last Friday had their sanity called into question as they cryptically encountered seven “D” a...

A Late, Late Start

Noah Finer | Jan 25 2016 | in Humor

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BVSD has been debating changing Fairview’s starting time from 8:05 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. or 8:45 a.m. For me, though, the time seems absolutely unreas...