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How to Get More Snow Days

Noah Finer | Mar 2 2016 | in Humor


This year, students have received a record amount of snow days in recent history for the BVSD district. Previously, it had been unheard of to rece...

Fairview, Monarch Students Peaceably Discuss Rivalry on Social Media

Ben Gelderloos | Feb 9 2016 | in Humor


Before Tuesday’s large game, students from both Fairview High School and Monarch High School engaged in a pleasant discussion on their schoo...

Teacher Confuses Student's Essay with Doctor's Note

Noah Finer | Feb 4 2016 | in Humor


Senior Winston Perez was confused when he was excused from class last Monday for a doctor’s note that he never knew about. Mr. Salazar, Perez’s I...

Tissue Mafia Gains Control of Fairview Tissue Market

Michal Olesiak | Feb 3 2016 | in Humor


It used to be plato o plomo (silver or lead), but now during a peak sick season, it has become tissue or lead. Due to necessity ...

Class Questions Sanity After Seven "D" Answers in a Row on Multiple Choice Test

Evan Derby | Jan 29 2016 | in Humor


Students taking Ms. Clemson’s Chapter 3 reading test last Friday had their sanity called into question as they cryptically encountered seven “D” a...

A Late, Late Start

Noah Finer | Jan 25 2016 | in Humor


BVSD has been debating changing Fairview’s starting time from 8:05 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. or 8:45 a.m. For me, though, the time seems absolutely unreas...

Kylo Ren Forms Army of Identically Dressed Junior Boys

Ben Gelderloos | Jan 19 2016 | in Humor


Reports have emerged the Sith Lord Kylo Ren is amassing an army of junior boys clad in uniform down vests, khaki pants, and boat shoes in order t...

Sophmore Self-Diagnoses Himself With Senioritis

Ben Gelderloos | Jan 19 2016 | in Humor


Sophomore Charles Truman announced to his group of friends on Thursday that he had self diagnosed himself with the early symptoms of senioritis an...

Newly Minted 18 Year Olds Lose All Hope After Powerball Drawing

Rachel Grushan | Jan 15 2016 | in Humor


After Wednesday night’s devastatingly huge Powerball drawing, fresh faced 18 year olds everywhere have lost all semblance of hope towards their fu...