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Fairview Remodeling Plans Unveiled--Eliminate All Windows

By David Hirschhorn in Humor

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Many students have been curious for a long time of what will happen with the extra money that BVSD schools gained through a vote passed in 2014. They have been waiting for a long time for news on the improvements that will occur throughout Fairview as a result of this vote.

Fairview has announced the hiring of Wynn-Doe Architecture. They are most known for their construction of the prison Alcatraz, located in San Francisco.

When talking to the lead architects, Brad Wynn and Nick Doe, Wynn and Doe stated, “We really loved our work on Alcatraz and want to emulate the work here at Fairview.”

In shocking news, their main focus is to get rid of every single window at Fairview High School. Fairview already has limited windows, but less is more seems to be the focus with the windows here.

“We really think it is essential for kids to be able to work without being distracted. We think that windows are THE biggest distraction for kids these days in the classroom,” said Wynn.

“Students really should be prepared to work hard under any circumstances. Who knows? One day a kid might be an accountant for a mining company and will have to do his calculations in a dark hole. Kids really have to be prepared for those unexpected circumstances. This is the best path for success,” said Doe, Wynn’s partner.

The architecture group really seems to be exemplifying the “KNIGHT TIME” theme throughout FHS by eliminating all the windows in the school.

“We saw that this was the Fairview KNIGHTS, so we wanted to take the KNIGHT TIME theme to its fullest potential.”

The other most notable change was that they are deciding to wipe out the 200 and 300 halls and expand the size of the cafeteria. This change is also is a bit of a shocker considering that the cafeteria is one of the least popular places to eat lunch.

“We believe that the primary reason for the cafeteria being so deserted is that it needs to be bigger. We feel that moving the classes of the 300 hall into the library will help the flow of the school a lot. We also will move the math classrooms into the gym. There they can practice making calculations in an athletic setting. Nick and I really are proud of the visionary ideas we have created for this school,” said Wynn.

For your information FHS, this is Wynn-Doe’s first school renovation. They have made a name for themselves by designing Alcatraz. They also have decided to paint the walls grey, add seventeen garbage cans in every single classroom, and get rid of all clocks and bells in the school.This certainly isn’t the change most of us in the Fairview community though we’d see but we will see how it plays out.

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This graph shows responses from every single member of the Fairview community in a complex survey.

 

Orange = Love It

Green = Like It

Yellow = Just Okay

Blue = Dislike It

Red = Hate It

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